Well, after that recent post, I am hairless.
Not all over. Just in the pits and on the lower half of my legs.
Earlier this week, I got fed up with the fact that I didn’t have any masculine warm-weather shirts to wear to work, and at being then limited by the combination of my wardrobe and my own feelings of what I want to look like.
…of course, the day after, I started bleeding.
I’d been wondering, for a while, if my comfort levels and feelings of masculinity vs. femininity follow my cycle at all, and this has made me even more keen in finding out. Now I just need to remember to actually keep track of such things.
Especially since, a few days later, I’m now regretting it.
Of course, on the flip side, I tell myself what does it matter. Because having done it now vs later isn’t going to change the feelings I have about myself and my presentation, and the issues I have with showing hair when looking like a woman, which – let’s be honest – is all the time, even when I’m dressing more manly.
Which then led to daydreaming in the shower about being able to “pass” – to have a small chest and smaller hips, and be able to actually choose whether, on any given day, I want to look like a man or a woman. Even if that’s a feminine man or a masculine woman.
If wishes were horses…
Anyway. That’s where that is. A magic overnight mastectomy ain’t gonna happen, and I need, really truly, to figure out how to dress this body of mine in a way I’m happy with, when I’m not looking and feeling more feminine.